Conflict. Understanding. Love

These three matters articulate with one another particularly in relationships. Every conflict happens for a reason. You love the person and you understand him/her too much until there is this starting point where you find everything he/she does relatively puts you off or could not satisfy or pleases you. Why does this happen? Are you caring too much and are you simple too conscious of every little details? You are too focusing on “he/she doesn’t understand you…” Am I right? But is understand really equals to love? When you first fall in love with this stranger man/woman, have you ever consider him or her as understanding you? Do you marry him/her because you understand him/her or he/she understands you? 

It has been fixed how you perceived what your partner does after some time. Therefore, it becomes a cycle for you that every time he/she does it, the same emotion comes and goes again. Nobody’s fault when little conflict arises, everyone has their own perspective. You think is logical to get upset but he/she thinks:” Why?”. The only thing one can prevent this from happening is to continue loving the person, stop questioning and tolerate that person. You may say this is a blind love but this is what happy couples do. They fight and shout loudly then next day they sit down, talk and is another brand new happy day for them. After several fights, you know that he/she doesn’t change, then this is a clear message that it is not working so why bother continue the fight? Just for the sake of unhappiness? Rather than being mad and making ourselves unhappy, we should confront the problem and work together to ensure a harmonious relationship. 

A couple asked themselves where does the problem starts? Is it just one problem or several that adds up? Is it a complicated one or a very simple one? Is it an apparent physical problem or mental problem? Is it possible to get rid of the problem or requires some time and adjustment? Is it one’s habit? Is it one’s people way of talking? Are you guys fighting for money? work? home? chores and this goes one. Remember when a marriage is broken, children always suffer. Even though, a couple has already gone through a lot of trouble in their issues, they mustn’t neglect the children. When they are left out, fear becomes the main domination then they gradually become unhappy and they hide so that they will not have to see such scenarios. When fights becoming more frequent, it is impossible to reverse into those happy times. 

It is always good when a small argument comes and goes easily, lasts for not more than three days because the dreadful days are not only unhealthy for the relationship but the people around the couple that have to bear with the sorrow. When one of them takes the approach, it is a good sign because it means that he/she does not want to give up the love. However, when one is slightly ‘ambitious’ and does not want to accept. Things will be pull down from the mild level to an agitated level. I know nobody likes conflict, yet without realizing it- you can choose: one sets the fire, another adds the fuel and continue with it OR one sets the fire, another puts out with water. Two people come together because they though they have understand each other, thus assuming they love each other. Two people separates because they have already understand each other too much, thus the love breaks off easily. Two people stay together till the end because they understand each other enough and know they love each other despite the salt & pepper that was added into their pure relationship. 

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